strange dream

I dreamt last night that I lost strength in my legs. I had control over them, but they wouldn't support my weight. I was playing field hockey. For some reason, just before each game I had to rinse off in the shower. Then, as I waited to run onto the field with my team, my legs began to get weak. I finished the game last night, but I had to be helped off the field by my teammates. My legs were buckling any time I tried to stand up.

I've had this dream many times before. It doesn't feel like a nightmare, although my paranoid side wonders if it's a premonition of some kind. I do not seem to be very alarmed in my dreams -- just annoyed. Usually, I am asking someone to help me up a flight of stairs and explaining that my legs had just given out on me. Weird.

riding on the BART train

The sun makes me squint. I think about the wrinkles that will show up later, but there is nothing to be done. I am surprised that I am not nodding off. Perhaps the extra sleep I got two days ago is fueling my consciousness now. The sounds of the train -- the screeching, the computerized voice -- are muffled by my earplugs. I love my earplugs. They are fluorescent green soft foam and come in their own orange case.

We enter the Transbay Tube. I have not noticed a sign or anything. The lights in the tunnel zoom by. Occasionally, there are gaps. I don't think about what's outside the tunnel usually. Sea monsters, old tires, perhaps a dead body.

Most people are reading, sleeping, or listening to their headphones. I wonder what worlds they've created for themselves. I imagine that many are enjoying their own private concert. Maybe someone is listening to a story or a sermon. I picture a translucent sphere around each of them and think of what images and sounds would fill them.

My bubble would be filled with z's if I weren't writing. It's a half-sleep where part of me stays awake to hear station announcements. On one occasion, that part deserted its post and I wound up three stations north of my stop.

Another tunnel. More lights. More screeching. Now I am getting sleepy. At least I made it to 16th Street.

it's official

Woohoo! As of today, I am a career UC employee. I was initially hired on a two-year contract, which would have expired in September. I don't want to jinx it, but I have to say that I have really enjoyed working for CDL. A quintessential team player, I need to feel like I'm a valued member of the organization I'm working for and I need to believe in its mission. CDL has been very supportive of me and my work, and I am happy that I will be able to continue my career there.

neighborly serenade

My next door neighbors occasionally subject me to really bad (and loud) Chinese (possibly Vietnamese) karaoke. Even with the walls muffling the sound, I can hear every off-key note. It's really bad. It makes my face scrunch up involuntarily.

bad jane

Yikes. I have been delinquent in my blogging duties. The first month of 2006 is a blur. I wish that I could report that this is because I was having too much fun for my own good, but alas, my life is not that exciting. But, I am happy to announce that I am emerging from a haze that has enveloped my life for over a year. Many thanks to all my friends who put up with me.

In the next weeks, I will try to organize my thoughts into coherent posts. I feel like I have a lot to say, but it will take me some time to put my ideas into any sort of readable form. I appreciate your patience.